Smithology
1998


How long can we sustain this thing, this never-ending tale,
That ranks with Hobbits, Lord of Rings, and Jonah and his Whale.
Swallow that (excuse the pun), and you’re there with the Smiths,
We’ll try to keep it factual, and expurgate the myths.

Her final year of school complete, now Alex takes the reins,
An awesome thing, genetics, when it comes to looks and brains.
Topped everything in sight this year, a sign of things to be,
Who said it’s not hereditary — she must take after Lee.
In February she got her Ls”, the P-Plate still to come,
She’s eyeing off the Beetle while Mike’s having all the fun.
There seems to be no hurry, guess that’s situation normal,
Til she turned up in her red dress at Calrossy’s year 12 formal,
Just looked a treat with partner Tim, how proud were we that night,
Our little girl has all grown up — we sure did something right.

Ben is still the quiet one, til you get him on the site,
A chat room addict making conversation day and night.
Strange things, these computers, but Ben’s got it worked out fine,
Headphones on and fingers flying (no concept of time).
Not sure about his music tastes, but country’s not the pick,
It’s groups like Prodigy and Korn, headbanging with a kick.
Bananas, yoghurt, pies and fruit juice keep him looking trim,
Discovered girls, or more correctly, they’ve discovered him!
Decided school is not that bad, his marks have really soared,
When you’re a boy and fifteen, there’s no chance of being bored.

The Sporties closed, the job was gone, but Lee was not deterred,
Cos when you’re good at what you do, then others spread the word.
An offer came from Rumpus Room, ah what a fitting name,
So back to work (without a break), she loves the child care game.
A dishwasher now proudly stands where kids have seldom trod,
She found that bribes and treats don’t work — a bought one does the job!
Still finds the time the pack CDs and get them in the mail
When Mike gets in his panic mode, the reason starts to fail.
She’s just the calming influence, must be Wednesday’s Tai Chi,
Or years of constant practice when you know the other three!

Let’s not forget that strange old bloke who lurks around the home,
Tucked in his little office, always on the bloody phone!
This country music’s a disease, it seems there’s no respite,
But we all know that STD’s much cheaper late at night.
With Gympie and Mildura seen some places through the year,
A lot of Ks, the festivals, occasional light beer.
It might seem an indulgence, but it actually pays the bills,
Maximum satisfaction with a minimum of skills.
With family, music and the job, Mike’s right where he belongs,
The sort of dream you tend to find in country music songs.

Another year wrapped up (almost), the Smiths have had a ball,
A Merry Christmas, great New Year and happiness to all.


Mike, Lee, Alex & Ben